Black Crab
In a country ravaged by war, a soldier, Caroline Edh (Noomi Rapace) joins a mission to transfer a package across frozen terrain, with the promise that she will be re-united with her daughter. The first two acts are gripping. The 6 soldiers on the trek are well defined, the sight of them skating across the ice is mesmerising and Rapace is excellent. The film loses momentum and its way in the last section when the horror of the consequences of their mission become clear, however.
Rating: 7 out of 10
Trust No One: The Hunt for the Crypto King
A documentary about the criminal activities and mysterious death of crypto currency millionaire Gerry Cotten. This works best for people like me who are unfamiliar with this story. Whilst it is hard to feel much sympathy with people who invested large sums of money in order to make a quick profit with no effort, this is pretty interesting material that is well put together. It did feel like the film was presenting a particular hypothesis only to backtrack at the end, though.
Rating: 6 out of 10
Broken Idol: The Undoing of Diomedes Diaz
Another documentary but this one is muddled and boring. Did a famous Colombian singer kill a fan? I did not care.
Rating: 3 out of 10
Love Like Falling Petals
A mawkish doomed romance about a photographer and hairdresser falling in love but receiving terrible news soon after. They are a sweet couple but the film is relentlessly miserable
Rating: 3.5 out of 10
All Hail
A dreadfully shrill Spanish ‘comedy’ about a TV weatherman who gets a forecast badly wrong. The actors try to make up for a lack of laughs in the script by shouting and frantically mugging. They fail.
Rating: 2 out of 10
A Violent Man
A relentlessly grim British prison drama centring on a violent inmate, Steve Mackelson played by Craig Fairbrass. It was clearly shot on a low budget as it mainly consists of scenes set in dimly cells featuring geezers gruffly threatening each other. Not terrible but it did not feel any more authentic than an episode of Porridge. The best moments feature Zoe Tapper as a counsellor.
Rating: 5.5 out of 10
Autumn Girl
I had high hopes for this Polish biopic of 1960s actress/singer Kalina Jedrusik. Maria Debska is impressively sensual in the lead role but the story of her being blackballed after refusing to sleep with a producer never catches fire. There are too many unnecessary scenes and songs that slow the film down way too much.
Rating: 5 out of 10
Battle Freestyle
A French teen drama about a dancing competition follows a familiar plot template but it is watchable enough.
Rating: 4.5 out of 10
Forever Out of My League
The final part of the trilogy following Marta and her friends is a satisfying enough conclusion to the story. In fact, each film has been a little bit better than the previous one, though one thing that has remained constant is the winning performance of Ludovica Francesconi in the title role. The easy options to tearjerk are largely avoided.
Rating: 6 out of 10
Confession
Colm Meany stars as a priest who finds a man with a gunshot wound in his church who holds him hostage. With a single set and a 4 person cast, this feels a little stage bound, although it has not actually been adapted from a play. Meany is very good as the conflicted man of God and the ending is pretty tense. However, it is quite slow paced before that.
Rating: 6.5 out of 10
The In Between
A sickly and hopelessly cliched drama about a teenage girl making contact with her recently deceased boyfriend. All the tired tropes are present. The girl is attractive, sparky and clever but boys are not interested in her. The guy she meets is sensitive and brainy, but also, obviously, a hunk. Plus his name is Skylar, which says it all really. Depressing.
Rating: 2 out of 10
Captain Nova
You don’t get a lot of Dutch films on Netflix but this one was better that I feared. Nova, a fighter pilot, travels back from the future to ty to avert an environmental disaster, but the time travel turns her back to a 12 year old girl. This works best as a road movie as Nova and a boy she befriends feel the authorities and the green message adds an interesting layer to the story. The more convoluted plot developments later in the film do not work so well, but Kika van de Vijver is terrific as the younger Nova.
Rating: 6 out of 10
Furioza
Yet another Polish crime movie about gangs of guys who meet in a forest to have have fights. A lot of police time seems to be wasted on a victimless crime. Seems a bit pointless.
Rating: 3 out of 10
Dancing on Glass
This Spanish drama about a pressured ballet dancer is a tedious affair, that despite the attempt to create a make believe world that the protagonists enter, feels very stale.
Rating: 2.5 out of 10
Return to Space
A documentary praising Elon Musk’s efforts to create a space programme. For Musk fanboys only as, apart from a few mentions of his eccentricities, it is very hagiographic. His spending of millions on a project that only has commercial gains at its heart whilst presenting himself as some sort of saviour and his tax evasion methods whilst also claiming millions of dollars of government grants are not mentioned.
Rating: 4 out of 10
Yaksha: Ruthess Operatives
A murky and dull Korean crime drama, indistinguishable from the last few Korean crime dramas on Netflix,
Rating: 3 out of 10
Metal Lords
Two high school misfits form a heavy metal band in attempt to win a battle of the bands competition. Surprisingly director Peter Sollett and writer D.B. Weiss breathe a lot of life into that overused plot. The depiction of the friendship between singer Hunter (Adrian Greensmith) and drummer Kevin (Jaeden Martell) feels natural and realistic. The unfortunately named Isis Hainsworth and Analesa Fisher offer good support, and bearing in mind the style of music, this is really quite a sweet story.
Rating: 7 out of 10
The Taming of the Shrewd
A breezy Polish rom com about a scientist who returns to her small hometown after finding out her husband is cheating on her. Her brother wants her to sell some family land and hires a handsome stranger to convince her. Feels like a Hallmark plot with a sprinkling of sex and swearing, but it is quite pleasing at times.
Rating: 5 out of 10
White Hot: the Rise and Fall of Abercrombie and Fitch
This documentary about the racist and discriminatory policies at the heart of the US clothing brand is told in a very conventional way, with the use of talking heads almost exclusively. The company’s actions were awful but there is not enough here for a 90 minute movie. I found the idiots who bought into the “all American” ideal and became obsessed with their overpriced clothes almost as worrying as the actions of the scumbags who ran the company,
Rating: 5.5 out of 10
Man of God
A rambling Nigerian movie about a man coming to terms with his abusive childhood that is worthy but boring.
Rating: 3 out of 10
The Turning Point
This is a gloomy and sluggish Italian crime flic that, only a few hours after watching it, I am struggling to remember anything that marks it out from the host of similar films on the platform.
Rating: 3.5 out of 10
Choose or Die
A grisly low budget horror film, that oddly, although shot in London with a mostly British cast, is set in the US. The premise of an 80s video game unleashing a curse when it is played, is not that original and the whole film seems a bit messy, with too many ideas thrown at the screen. It does, though, have some creepy moments and it is good to have Eddie Marsan in a key but small role.
Rating: 5.5 out of 10
The Bubble
This film about making a trashy action movie in the midst of the pandemic feels very self indulgent. Some gags work but a lot of others fall flat despite a cast that includes Karen Gillan, Leslie Mann, David Duchovny, Kate McKinnon, John Lithgow, James McAvoy and Peter Serafinowicz. It is much too long and the TikTok dance numbers are plain horrible, If you want to see better films about making a movie, try State and Main or Living in Oblivion.
Rating: 5 out of 10