2003’s Wrong Turn was one of the better horror films of the early part of this century. A series of poorly received sequels followed that and now we have a remake of sorts. A group of youngsters go hiking in the Appalachian Trail but are confronted by a mysterious community who live in the wilderness. Whilst it varies a lot from the original movie, it does not feel in any way new or show anything very original amidst the copious amounts of gore as the group are picked off. However, it is efficiently enough made and it is always nice to see Matthew Modine, albeit in a supporting role as a concerned father.
Rating: 6 out of 10
It seems like a long time since Jackie Chan was making films like Rush Hour and Shanghai Noon in Hollywood. Whatever you may think of them, they were competently made. The same cannot be said for the ludicrously bad Vanguard. Chan plays Tang, the leader of the Vanguard group, a company that provides security for their wealthy clients. When an accountant is targeted by mercenaries, Tang’s team have to protect him and his family.
The plot is pretty straightforward, so the film relies on the quality of its action set pieces, and in those it fails dismally. Cheap-looking CGI is mixed with unconvincingly choreographed fighting and embarrassingly speeded-up footage. It looks like all the actors are being dubbed irrespective of the language they are speaking in, as they fail to deliver preposterous dialogue with any conviction.
This would be a shoo-in for worst film of the year if it wasn’t frequently unintentionally funny, such as Tang’s company being able to locate someone based on just a description of them being “in Africa”. In fact the whole African sequence that follows is mind bogglingly bad with the most unconvincing lions you could imagine and an absurd white water rapids sequence. It is also pretty obvious where a lot of funding has come with the pro-Chinese government propaganda and a last act that is basically an extended advert for Dubai.
Rating: 2 out of 10
The ills of social media are addressed in a highly amusing way in The Columnist. Femke (the excellent Katja Herbers) writes a column in a newspaper in The Netherlands and is subjected to horrendous abuse in the unmodified comments section of the online version. Frustrated that no one takes her complaints seriously she takes matters into her own hands by tracking down and killing the worst culprits.
Director Ivo Van Aart’s pitch black comic horror is pointed without ever being preachy, thanks to Daan Windhorst’s great script. You will find yourself cheering as Femke despatches the vicious trolls.
Rating: 8.5 out of 10
Wrong Turn, Vanguard, and The Columnist can be found on all the usual digital rental services.
The title is pretty pretentious but Preparations to be Together for an Unknown Period of Time (on Curzon Home Cinema) is a real treat. Natasa Stork plays Vizy Márta, a gifted neurosurgeon who briefly meets and falls for a colleague, Drexler János (Viktor Bodó),at a conference in New Jersey. They arrange to meet in Budapest where János works but when she sees him, he claims not to know who she is.
Is Márta making it up or has she imagined the whole episode? Has János had cold feet? The film is at it’s best when those questions are unanswered. Heavily influenced by Hitchcock, with the voyeurism of Rear Window and the obsession and unsettling tone of Vertigo, director Lili Horvát has delivered an intriguing key thriller.
Admittedly, the answer, when revealed, feels like a bit of a let down but I’m sure not that there was any solution to the puzzle that could have been both surprising and believable.
Rating: 9 out of 10
On Netflix this week, we have Moxie! Vivian, a timid high school girl, emboldened by Lucy, her fearless new friend, and by learning of her Mum’s rebellious past publishes an anonymous zine that challenges the endemic sexism at her school. There are some issues with the story. The idea of publishing a physical document rather than something online seems strangely quaint and the tired trope of two girls falling foul because one of them is attracted to a new group of friends and starts a tentative relationship with a boy is trotted out.
However, Amy Poehler’s movie is otherwise an original and refreshing take on the American high school experience. The characters feel far more real than is usual in films in this genre and the performances of Hadley Robinson as Vivian and Poehler as her Mum are both excellent. Lauren Tsai also excels in the thankless role of the spurned friend and Alycia Pascual-Pena is very good in the more meaty part of Lucy. The liberal use of Bikini Kill on the soundtrack is a plus in this impressive second feature from Poehler.
Rating: 7.5 out of 10
Also on Netflix is the documentary Pelé. When I was growing up it was a given that Pelé was the best football player ever. Now many people would say that either Maradona or Messi have surpassed him. This documentary attempts to re-state Pele’s case. This has the benefit of a lengthy interview with the great man but cannot overcome the fact that the footage of him playing is quite limited. It does not offer much new for those well versed in the subject but it isn’t a bad introduction for younger fans.
Oh, and if I had to pick…Messi…probably!
Rating: 7 out of 10
Finally on this platform is A Coven of Sisters. In the Basque Country in 1609, a group of young women are suspected of practicing witchcraft. Interrogated and tortured by The Inquisition, they confess in order to delay their fate. After a fairly interesting set up, this movie fizzles out and ends up quite the bore.
Rating: 3.5 out of 10