Starting this time with Netflix and Lindsay Lohan appears in a second Netflix Christmas movie, Our Little Secret. She plays Avery who is spending her first Christmas with her boyfriend’s family but discovers her ex is also part of the holiday festivities and decides to hide their romantic history. There are some genuinely amusing moments with good performances from Lohan, Ian Harding as her ex and Kristin Chenoweth as his controlling mother.
In The Merry Gentlemen, Ashley, a former Broadway dancer decides to stage an all-male, Christmas-themed revue in order to save her parents’ small town performing venue. I suppose it makes a change from small town bakery or small town café, but there is not much that is original here. Britt Robertson, who plays Ashley, is far too good for this material and is the main reason to watch.
A Paris Christmas Waltz features a novice dancer. played by Jen Lilley, pairing with a professional to take on a Christmas pro-am dance competition. I am baffled how ballroom dancing has gone from a minority interest into something that has mass appeal over the last decade or so. If you are a fan of the BBC rating juggernaut, I guess you will appreciate the dancing, but the romance is Strictly by the numbers.
The Snow Sister is a Norwegian weepie about a young boy who needs his Christmas spirit rekindled after his sister dies on Christmas Eve. I suppose, the country of origin makes this a little different to most of these Christmas movies, but I am not sure who the audience for this is. The focus on kids suggests it is aimed at children but it must be far too gloomy to entertain most of them.
In ‘Twas the Text Before Christmas, Trevor Donovan and Merritt Patterson star as two strangers who meet up after a text is sent to the wrong number. This is such a sickly sweet film that I found it hard to stomach.
Christmas on Windmill Way has a shockingly unoriginal plot: Mia, a baker, battles to save her family’s mill from greedy developers who promise to keep it running as it is but actually have plans to demolish it. Of course, the company representative is her old high school sweetheart, and, of course, he knew nothing about their plans. What is the point of making yet another film with this plot!?
Ratings out of 10:
Our Little Secret: 7
The Merry Gentlemen: 5.5
A Paris Christmas Waltz: 4
The Snow Sister: 3.5
‘Twas the Text Before Christmas: 3
Christmas on Windmill Way: 3
On Paramount Plus you can see Bobby Farrelly’s new family comedy, Dear Santa. A young dyslexic boy makes a spelling mistake and sends his Christmas list to Satan (Jack Black) instead of Santa. Black has some decent one liners but the best thing about Dear Santa is how it has enraged the Christian right in America! Unfortunately, the child actors are all quite poor and the great concept is not used as well as it could have been.
Rating: 5 out of 10
Movies 24 are showing the highest profile Hallmark movie of the season, Holiday Touchdown: A Chiefs Love Story. Hunter King stars as a Kansas City Chiefs fanatic who wants to win the Fan of the Year award. Christmas feels a bit shoehorned in and you really have to be a Chiefs fan to find anything enjoyable.
Also on the channel, Holiday Crashers features two friends making up identities to crash Christmas parties. Not a totally original plot but it is something new for Hallmark. It is watchable but they did not make the most of the idea.
In A Carol for Two, aspiring Broadway star Violette Wagner gets a job at Fiore’s, a diner that is famous for its singing wait staff awaiting that big break. Luck seems to be on her side when she gets a coveted slot, singing during Fiore’s annual Christmas Eve concert, which is attended by a who’s who of the theatre world. Neither the music nor the attempt at comedy worked.
Trivia at St Nicks features astronomy professor Celeste (Tammin Sursok) who loves the annual Christmas bar quiz. But when he usual partner can’t attend, she is forced to team up with football coach Max (Brant Daugherty). This is one of the better Hallmark offering this year with a different plot from the norm. There are fun performances from Kathleen Elizabeth Monteleone and Bekah Zornosa but Celeste’s obsession with winning the quiz is quite annoying.
Ratings out of 10:
Holiday Touchdown: 3
Holiday Crashers: 4.5
A Carol For Two: 3
Trivia at St Nicks: 5
ITVX are getting into the act too. Firstly with The Holiday Exchange. Writer Taylor Frey also stars as Wilde Williams, who, wanting to get away from his ex at Christmas, swaps homes with Oliver (Rick Cosnett) after meeting on an Air BnB app. Romantic hijinks follow. This gay re-working of The Holiday soon becomes pretty dull.
Operation Nutcracker is both a romance and a mystery, with an event planner (Ashley Newbrough) and an heir to a family fortune (Christopher Russell) try to track down a stolen valuable nutcracker. Not terrible, but it feels like rich people’s problems with a story about a sick child bolted on to give it wider appeal.
In Once Upon a Christmas Wish, a town mayor’s childhood Christmas wish list starts to come true. Poorly written with some horrible musical numbers and an awful lead performance by Mario Lopez.
Ratings out of 10:
The Holiday Exchange: 3.5
Operation Nutcracker: 4.5
Once Upon a Christmas Wish: 1.5
On My5, you can see A European Christmas. I am used to these films featuring American women going to a romantic, festive European city at Christmas. Maybe Salzburg or Vienna. But, in this one, film director Ivy Allen (Caprice Bourret), after a series of flops, travels to Serbia to try to find the star of her biggest hit movie, Hunter Williams (Philip Boyd). He does not want to return to Hollywood but, instead, shows her the wonders of a Serbian Christmas. Interestingly, but not surprisingly because it was partly financed by the Serbian tourist board, he does not mention war crimes or human rights abuses! This is a dismal excuse for a long advert for visiting Serbia and features one of the worst performances of the year from Bourret.
Rating out of 10: 1.5
Sky Movies have premiered A Sudden Case of Christmas, a remake of the 2022 Italian film Improvvisamente Natale. Young Claire’s parents are divorcing and they take her to her grandfather’s hotel in Italy to tell her. In an effort to save their marriage, Claire convinces her family to celebrate one last Christmas together, in the middle of August. Danny De Vito is wasted in the role of the grandfather, as is Adrian Dunbar as his employee. Not a single laugh to be had.
Rating out of 10: 2.5